It is now almost seven years since my journey started, and I came eye-to-eye with a dolphin for the first time. And how it changed my life, I still feel it's all a big mystery. I have told this story many times on the yacht over the years, and every time I realize how magical it is.
But it is not only me; I have seen countless souls overcome their biggest fear in life, and they went home with so much confidence. Statements like feeling reborn, transformed, awakened, finding their soul purpose, connected to their heart, getting imagination back are repeated among my guests. And now, after hundreds and hundreds of testimonials, there is no doubt left in me that there is definitely something very powerful going on in this lagoon.
As revield in my first post, I am collecting stories from my dolphin friends all over the world, and it made me reflect on my own story.
So what was it for me that changed so much?
For years, I lived in a comfortable, predictable life, yet fear was always present. Fear of failure, fear of change, fear of stepping outside the box. I told myself I was safe, but deep down, I knew I was stuck.
I had been very fearless as a young woman, and why I started becoming scared of everything is another story for another time. But the biggest loss for me was my fear of the sea, something I had loved so much as a child.
I was a mermaid. I learned how to swim underwater before I started swimming above. I went to the local swimming hall alone when I was five, and every time it was family day at the beach I didn’t want to come up from the water, even if my lips were blue.
I could say that my fear started during a traumatic event when an angry old man nearly drowned me in a swimming pool. Or during a scuba dive that turned out very badly when a divemaster wasn’t paying attention to me during a panic attack. But it was deeper than that.
I once spent three weeks on holiday in Thailand without being able to swim because I was scared of jellyfish. I was scared of flying. I had mild hypochondria. I received offers to present at conventions as a spinning instructor and turned them down because of fear. I said no to photoshoots that felt outside my comfort zone. I was always nervous that something would happen to me, my dog, my husband. I let fear control my whole life.
In Thailand 2017, I missed the sea and wished so much for the fear to go away.
2019 was a big year for me. I found myself at a crossroads. I was a yin yoga teacher, fitness instructor, and photographer, needing to decide whether to pursue photography more seriously or say yes to a 200-hour Hatha yoga teacher training and go deeper into my yoga practice.
I will tell the full story of that later in the blog, but for now I will say this. The universe decided to send my husband and me to Egypt in January 2019. Our planned ski trip was cancelled because the cabin had been double-booked, and there was no other option within our budget than Egypt. We had been going there annually for holidays, but this trip turned out to be the stepping stone for me.
I was dealing with decision anxiety. Two deadlines. I had a contract for a photo studio in Stockholm that needed my signature, and at the same time, the yoga institute needed my confirmation. I couldn’t do both. That would not have been reasonable. This occupied my mind during the holiday, and my body was tense and filled with unease.
Then one afternoon after a dive, I was sitting in the dive center talking to Khaled, the divemaster who had become so important to me over the years. He was the one who had made me fall in love with scuba diving after years of diving with fear all over the world. He made me feel safe and seen, and I always asked the dive center for him to be our guide.
He told me about the dolphins and Sataya. About how he worked there as a guide and about his dream of creating a week there with yoga.
This moment I will never forget. Everything suddenly felt clear. I knew my path and it felt right. All the tension melted off me and I could take a full breath for the first time in a very long time.
When I came back to Egypt the next time, I was alone. Filled with excitement and confidence, I was on my first solo trip in twenty years, and it felt thrilling. I was going to meet the dolphins for the first time.
July 2019, I was filled with excitement to go on my first solo journey, visiting my friends in a faraway land. But absolutely no idea of what was awaiting me.
But the biggest change happened when I arrived in the lagoon. I still remember that first time. I slipped into the water, and suddenly they were there: twenty, maybe thirty dolphins, surrounding us, swirling in a dance of energy. My heart pounded. Would I panic? Would my fear creep in?
Then something inside me was letting go. I dived down, and instead of fear, I felt pure freedom and an unbelievable happiness. It was a feeling inside me I hadn’t felt since I was a child. Being completely in the moment, no “what ifs” or what was. Time was standing still, and nothing else but the here and now was important.
July 2019, My first meeting with the dolphins. Just seconds after I jumped in from the zodiac.
It wasn’t just the dolphins. It was the whole set-up. The guides taught me to free dive. Something I had been longing to do for years, but never been able to because of my fear. It was such a playful atmosphere in the water. We went out on what felt like a pirate ship. On board, it was mostly Egyptians, and we danced all night to the beats of Egyptian music that felt so exotic to me. I felt like a kid at summer camp. The joy and the welcoming energy from the crew, the warm summer night, it was a fairytale.
The stars were so bright, and I decided to fall asleep on the top deck. I saw a small blue cluster in the sky, and the guide told me about Al Thuraya, the Pleiades.
I didn’t know in that moment how important they would become to me. But this was the first of many, many times my eyes were drawn to them, as if they were saying they were watching over me.
La Vela, she will always be special to me, and every time I see her in Sataya I remember that night.
The second day in the water, I had one very special moment with a dolphin that has been with me since then. I received a download, a message that I shall return with others who needed this experience. It was a calling and a soul mission. I can’t really explain how that feels. To finally realize a huge purpose in your life. I felt so privileged and blessed that the universe, God, wanted to trust me with this gift.
I went back home crying, because my soul stayed in Sataya. Before I knew it, I was back, and instead of just being a passenger, I returned as a guide. I said goodbye to the life I knew and moved to Egypt so that I could bring people to swim with dolphins, to show them the moment when fear dissolves, and something greater takes its place.
